Tag Archives: power

Power Rangers The Movie Drinking Game

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After coercing our film-loving, plot-illuminating housemate, Meg,  into watching the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. We decided that instead of watching this like the sober finches of the Galapagos, we would endure the ninety minute calamity-classic doing a shot every time we noticed a cliché catchphrase like “see ya later alligator” – Ivan Ooze, intentionally compromising pun “I’ve got a bone to pick with you” – White Power Ranger (whilst fighting dinosaur skeletons), and ridiculous music that is played over scenes of no importance at all.

So the rules are simple – a sip, of a prolonged duration for minor instances of cheesy: behaviour, lines, music, sayings, bad green screens – the key is to be understanding of where each incident could be categorically organized into a scale; so anything 5> would be sip and 6< would be a shot! The drink of course is your decision, the shot is always nice to have something between the strength of vodka but stronger than schnapps – not too much and not too little, that’s the dream!

After twenty minutes of rib-tickling, lip-smacking idioms of far too obvious description, a bottle and half of shots has been annihilated. Continuous hand shaking and rhino-mercenary but-kicking has lead me to believe that this is the future of student drinking games. Never before have over-dramatic news broadcasts, and villain-induced witticisms been so damaging to ones liver!

Just to mention: “uh oh, were in trouble” – is genuinely part of the soundtrack. They also have a giant red button which kick’s other specifically similar sized robots in the metal genitals – convenient.

During one scene, you may remember, a rhino explodes into thousand of pieces after being corkscrew kicked so hard – needless to say a lot of alcohol has been consumed. Not even mentioning the collective skating, hand shaking, cockpit-swaying, child-filled mono-railing, glass-shattering building shaking brilliance that the power rangers ensue,

One genuine issue about the film is the fist-pumping white ranger has to be the leader – of course, seems a little racist, considering the black ranger is reduced to being a frog! – well done Brian Spicer! Some may say it was a different time back then, others simply suggesting that being the black ranger surely the crotch is the most appropriate place for him – can hardly imagine the white ranger having an equally sized time down there – ah stereotypes.

So spread the word, drink the dream and think – what would Zordon do?!

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Why bother?

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I often feel as though I am drifting through life, asking question after question, studying why and how things do the things they do, and yet, I still don’t have the answers. After asking countless lecturers, with PHD’s, they cannot often agree on the degree of correctness that my questions has provoked. So, maybe it isn’t about finding answers and knowing everything there is to know about how and why linguistically, style can affect the word choice of a, [Lower middle class] speaker and change their idiolect almost immediately. Instead of asking: Why does that even matter? Should it matter?

You must understand by now that everything that we believe in is fabricated, conjured, manipulated and artificially decided by the beholder of a “new discovery”. When there was nothing but settlements in England haggling and bargaining for sustenance, cattle, tools and everything else you can think of; money was created to fix the fluctuation and uncertainty of trying to “buy” something. This ideology is huge in western society, not a day goes by when I don’t “buy” something from a supermarket (also synthetic). The physical representation of buying and selling items fuels the way we live now and however convenient it may be to go online and purchase clothes or food it is still not real, well it is, but its imaginary, well not really, but it is man made.

Knowledge is power, but don’t you see. We made knowledge. Numbers, time, language, music, technology, law, sports and medicine. Our entire life is filled with these ersatz topics, always evolving and each with their own rules and regulations regarding how to and how not to do specific things within each sub-topic. Don’t get me wrong we’re not trying to learn why medicine works and why time fits so perfectly, because it was already there, we just gave it a name. The reason for making synthetic things boils down to three areas: measure, entertain, control.

Measure: Like numbers we created time to measure how long it takes for the Earth to travel the sun, moon, etc. Time, for the most part, appears to be a convenience more than anything, a way of making sure that you can measure between when you leave and arrive and make it simpler than tracking shadows.

Entertain: Other than waiting to die, taking part in hobbies and entertaining ourselves and others around us seems the only way to make this fable more bearable and seems like a distraction from the purpose of our lives, if there is one.

Control: Rules and regulations are everywhere, religion, law, ethics. You name it. All to just control you and try prevent you from doing certain things. Whether or not it is right to say what someone can or can’t do or not to say what someone can and can’t do is up to you.

So at the end of the day, it is convenient that these distractions are in place, otherwise all we’d see is: murder, unwilling procreation and everyone lacking control, entertainment and no one being able to measure how bad that would really be compared to what we have now.