As a young whipper-snapper things like computers were still too expensive for middle class ‘muggles’ like ourselves to have in our home, and my parents didn’t have enough money to buy a television and what-not. Now this may not be the case for the other nineties kids, but, the principle is applicable nonetheless. Before the techno-boom of the millennium, here are some things I will miss about being a young boy:
I remember me and my brother furiously slapping and tapping ginormous robust buttons, whilst trying to maneuver a stick-shift, joystick – hardest thing ever – but by god if it wasn’t some of the best gaming I’ve ever experienced. zooming blue, pixelated across the screen trying to grab as many oddly shaped coins and defeat the comically large Dr, Eggman – who incidentally didn’t look a lot like an egg. My father eventually became outrageously distressed by something my behaviorally indifferent brother had done, to which he tried to chew and throw the game cartridge into bin, which he missed and thus ended up enraging him more, ah the 90’s.
Fire station play-mat:
If you didn’t have one of these, stop reading, actually you can stay, you might learn a thing or two about a 5 year old’s 2D GTA. I can’t tell you how many hours I logged on this mat, pretending there was a fire at the church or a plane had crashed at the police station, or a burglar had stolen from the shops – I only just realized how disturbing that is as a five year old to imagine. However, it did give me carpet burn, and perspective, I realized after about two years that it was just a mat, these weren’t real people – the world does sort of work the same as I imagined but at least then It was just pretend, and that’s what made it special.
To this day, I can still remember the beautifully crispy breaded outer layer combined with the tongue twirling, lip smacking, heart stopping – literally – taste as all those years ago I bit into a good old turkey twizzler. Post-discovery of superstore giants like Tesco supposedly unaware that horse meat had been introduced into the acclaimed 100% beef burgers that they so proudly boasted about, now why did we let that pretentious budgie smuggler Jamie Oliver eradicate them from our diet, when I can guarantee that you all still shop at Tesco. Anyway, farewell old buddy, you will be sorely missed.
I only experienced half of the 90’s and you could argue that I’ve spent more of my life this side of the millennium, actually that is kind of a fact, but I guess that sinking feeling fades, that sense of familiarity illuminates, and everything feels safe again. You knew exactly who you were and exactly what you were doing. So in 2020 I guess i’ll be reminiscing about the simpler times of the 2010’s – strange.